"First you say you do, and then you don't"

It's highly unusual to find both members of a couple at the same point on their journey to decoupling. More likely, one is ahead of the other and either feels already out of the relationship or well along the way. This, of course, leaves the other in a quandary. Perhaps this individual only recently learned that the marriage was heading toward the rocks. Or perhaps he or she held on to slim hopes the other person would come to their senses, or the whole nightmare would magically disappear. Some believe that, if you don't talk about the problem, it goes away. Unfortunately, it doesn't. If one of you wants to end the marriage, it will end, one way or another. Either you will try negotiating the terms of the decoupling in mediation, or the matter will end up in family court. Until that time, the one left behind may exhibit what, on first glance, seems like odd behavior. She may state unequivocally one day that she is totally on board with divorce, only to change he